Eulogy of my brother

Eulogy of my brother

This poem is a thanksgiving, an expression of gratitude for the many blessings in a human’s life despite loss and hardships.  It is also the essence of the resilience that we need to overcome life’s challenges. Gratitude is the cornerstone in building up resiliency. Resilience helps to heal from the loss.  This is the process that I went through to cope with the death of my beloved brother, to grieve, heal and overcome the loss.  “Eulogy of my Brother” is one of the poems from my book ‘Rise and Fall of My Beloved”, page 58-59, where I count his blessings and mine since childhood as orphans up to his death. Now that I share this experience with you, my readers, this poem  becomes yours to help you find gratitude during this thanksgiving to cope with your loss and challenges.

 

Dear All,
No death is a good death.
Death is a moment of great sorrow and grieving,
A moment of loss and pain, desolation, and confusion,
A moment of cries and tears, and sadness to the core,
A moment of many questions flowing into my mind.
A tenacious inner voice spoke to me in this way:

“Look around you and remember his life from the beginning.”
I looked around and saw four lovely and beautiful children,
All born from my brother, each carrying the name of “Zola”
Purposefully encrusted inside their first names as such:
Zolana, Zolao, Zolatti, and Zolaza. I smiled.

I smiled, recalling how much I used to tease him.
I called him a narcissist for naming all his children after himself.
We laughed a lot about that, and he was so proud of it.
He made sure to have his name engraved within his children’s
names.

He wanted to remind us of him every time we call them.
He wanted to continue to live not only in our hearts
But also through our mouths to celebrate his name.
He simply wanted us to remember him every day.
One Zola is dead, but four others are alive.
And I will always love and remember my brother.

Then I recalled our childhood,
Reviewing every step in his life until manhood.
I realized how blessed he was
From the speechless and bullied little orphan boy
To the master’s degree engineering student,
A successful and respectable community builder,
A nice, loving, and caring husband and father,
A kind, generous, and reliable brother, uncle, and friend.
Blessings! He did have them abundantly.

So, I asked myself:
Should I continue to weep and grieve?
How do I overcome my grief? The loss is immense.
It seems an injustice to have lost him so soon.
I choose to be thankful
For many blessings in his life up to the end,
Surrounded with love by family
And well prepared for the afterlife.

He did not die a sudden death.
His pain and suffering, however long and painful,
Were a blessing. He was given time and opportunity
To repent, confess, forgive, and be forgiven,
To love and be loved unconditionally.

I choose to give thanks and praises,
For God prepared him to enter his grace
In a life after life without pain or suffering,
A last perfect example of resilience and blessings.
I am comforted that he is at peace.
I will no longer see him, but I will always remember
What he used to tell me:
“I have to protect you.”
Indeed, now I know that he will always be with me.

I came across these first powerful verses of Psalm 103
Written in the introduction of a French Bible:
“Bless the Lord, O my soul;
And all that is within me,
Bless His Holy Name!
Bless the Lord, O my soul,
And forget not all His benefits…”

I give praise and thanks for your life, Zola.
So that I help myself to grieve and heal
I will always remember you, a good creature.
Rest in peace, my Beloved Brother.


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